Welcome back to Before I Do: A Biblical Blueprint for Love and Marriage. I noticed some comments suggesting I rename this series to Before and After I Do, recognizing that married couples are tuning in as well. So, a big welcome to everyone! If this is your first time watching, I encourage you to watch the entire series. Whether in the context of marriage or life in general, what you know truly matters. The knowledge you gain can make the difference between failure and success.

When we discuss marriage, it’s essential to understand God’s standard, His ways, and the roles He calls us to as husbands and wives. What marriage embodies is so crucial to thriving in it. As we discussed earlier, marriage is a God-ordained institution—it did not start with us; it’s His idea. Therefore, what you know about marriage and your role in it is vital.

In the series so far, we’ve explored the meaning of marriage, its purpose, and understanding love within marriage. Today, we’re focusing on who a godly husband is. Before diving into that, let’s first define what a husband is. A husband is a man who enters into a legally or culturally recognized union with a woman, based on mutual love, commitment, and a desire to build a life together. This is key because you may be listening and thinking, My husband isn’t a godly husband. I think I made a mistake. But, no—don’t think that. A husband is a man who entered into a legally recognized union with you, made vows, and committed to building a home together. God recognizes that commitment, and He is for it.

Let’s look at Ephesians 5:22: Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. It doesn’t say, Submit to your biblical husband, your godly husband, your Jesus-following husband, or your Bible-reading husband. It simply says, Submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord. God respects order, and we’ll explore this further. If you’re married and feel that your husband doesn’t embody these qualities, pray for him. If he’s willing, encourage him to watch this series with you and seek resources that will educate you both on what God says about marriage.

Remember, you submit to your husband because that’s the man you married, and you made vows before the Lord. For those who are not yet married, this series will help you understand why it’s crucial not to rush into marriage. It’s not just about feelings; it’s about understanding how a man thinks. Ask the right questions. Don’t just focus on the honeymoon destination—learn about his character. Is he a man who can lead? How does he view the role of a husband? Is he godly? Knowing how he thinks, rather than just what he buys you or how he looks, will help you determine if this is someone you can build a life with.

Now, let’s dive into the five roles of a godly husband:

1. He is a leader: Ephesians 5:23 says, For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church and He is the Savior of the body. The husband’s role as a leader isn’t about wielding power or having the final say to control his wife. It’s not about manipulation or abuse. Being a leader is a posture of service. It means taking responsibility and being a good steward of what God has entrusted to him, especially in the context of his family.

Let’s break that down further in the next segment, as we explore what true leadership looks like in marriage.