Love Your Life

It’s hard to love a life that you don’t trust anymore, but Sis suffering will teach you lessons that blessings cannot. In this message, our girl SJR is here to bring us a glisten of hope!

There were some moments and I would pull up to orange theory.
This is a true story but I feel like I’m in a safe place and I would say not today.
I mean I’m dressed up. I’ve dropped the kids off. I’m sitting outside. I’m clocked in.
But mm mm because I need to know what’s gonna happen when I go.
I don’t today, I’m not in the mood for a surprise.
This is not find myself on Twitter trying to Google. What is the workout today?
If I’m gonna be on the row machine for 12 minutes, I’m going to the donut shop which I really need deliverance cause it’s not enough to not work out.
Now. You got to go eat doughnuts and not work out which don’t have nothing to do with my sermon.
I just want, it’s a holy place and I just felt like I should confess that there are moments where I don’t care that it’s gonna make me better.
I just can’t pick myself up or convince myself to walk into a circumstance without knowing what’s gonna happen.
I can’t afford to not know I can’t afford to live vulnerably.
I can’t afford to open up.
I can’t afford to take a chance because I cannot afford to walk away with another heartbreak.
I cannot afford to walk away with another pool. Another stretch, another tear.
There are some moments in our life where we just cannot afford to not know.
It’s hard to love a life that you don’t trust anymore.
When I don’t trust life anymore, it’s difficult for me to show up and I cannot help but imagine that when we find a ruth in the text that she’s trying to pick up the pieces from a life that is difficult to love, she left her religion.
She found someone who she could be in it with.
Now that person is gone, the person who made it worth leaving her culture, leaving her society changing the way that she showed up.
Now, that person is gone and she’s trying to rebuild and redefine her life and it is very difficult to rebuild redefine and love your life in the middle of it.
Maybe that’s why some of us are struggling because if you’re like me, you found yourself in a season where you recognize that this chapter of my life is called the rebuilding.
This chapter of my life is called the redefining.
And because I don’t know what it is becoming, it’s difficult for me to love it because I’m afraid of what I’m gonna lose in the process.
I don’t know who I’m gonna be on the other side of this.
I don’t know if I’m still gonna have the same joy.
I don’t know if I’m gonna survive with the same openness.
I don’t know if I still have the same creativity, but I’m allowing myself to go through the redefining anyway because obedience is better than sacrifice.
Or maybe obedience is sacrifice because I have to give up my comfort zone in order to be obedient.
And sometimes in church we make obedience seem like you can do it with confidence.
But the truth is sometimes obedience is sacrifice.