Unrealistic Expectations – Pt 2 | Joyce Meyer | Enjoying Everyday Life

Has your expectations got you feeling discouraged? On this episode of Enjoying Everyday Life, Joyce Meyer shares promises from God’s Word that will help you stay hopeful and happy.

Joyce Meyer, one of the world’s leading practical Bible teachers and New York Times best-selling author, shares encouragement and advice to help us enjoy our daily lives.

With a heart to share Christ and love people, Joyce’s messages help people in all walks of life to grow in their faith, learn to study the Bible, find healing from the wounds of life, get answers to life’s questions and encounter the love of God in a powerful way.

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When the devil really attacks you, you need to tell him you’re gonna be sorry you did this because I’m God’s gonna get me through this and I’m gonna have some experience and I’m gonna use it to help other people.
I’m Joyce Meyer.
I’ve seen God’s power transform my own life, and he will do it for you.
Do you know that you can change your level of joy?
And I can change my level of joy by simply learning to focus on what we do have rather than focusing on what we do not have.
Alright.
Well I’m upset I expected you to invite me to your party and you didn’t.
Well, I’m upset I expected you to call or come by and see me and you didn’t.
Well, is that your fault that you’re upset or is it my fault that you’re upset?
See a lot of times we get upset at people because they don’t do things that we expected them to do and they didn’t even know we expected them to.
And this especially happens between men and women.
Because women expect husbands to do a lot of things that they just totally goes over their head.
They just don’t get it at all.
You want them to understand you.
Well, they they’re not ever going to. A man is not gonna understand a woman.
Especially when she gets up and has one of those hormonal days.
He doesn’t have those days, he doesn’t know what it’s like.
So, I’ve finally trained Dave. I don’t care if you understand or not.
Just tell me you do. So now we have a new problem because he says, I understand and I said, no you don’t.
But you see that’s the way it is when a woman’s like that.
You’re not gonna make her happy no matter what you say.
But she expects you to, remember that. But it’s really her expectation that’s making her unhappy.
Come on, all the guys like that.
When you talk like this sometimes the women clap, sometimes the men clap.
I don’t know about you but when I first heard this particular type of thing presented, that it’s it’s our our expectations that make us unhappy.
It really helped me a lot because I realized that a lot of times we’re expecting people to do stuff and it’s not even in their wheelhouse.
Just because you would do something, you cannot expect somebody else to do that because they may not even be wired that way at all.
So just a few realities. First reality, nobody and nothing is perfect.
We say that but then, people go from church to church.
They don’t like this about their church so they go to another one.
And they don’t like something about that church so they go to another one.
And then they don’t like that church so they go to another one.
Did it ever occur to you that maybe you’re the thing you don’t like at the church you’re going to?
This is a true story, a woman was getting married for the 7th time And our pastor was doing the ceremony and she went to him and said, pastor, I need you to pray that this man will treat me right.
And he said, well, you’ve been married 7 times and you probably need to consider that you’re the only common denominator in all 7 marriages.
Uh. You know, we chase perfection when we’re 20 but by the time you’re a little bit older, you realize that it’s just a myth And you just deal with it.
Real life is not perfect. Here’s how you can be perfect.
James 32, for we all stumble in many ways but if anyone does not stumble in what he says he’s a perfect man.
So when you can get to the point where you never make one mistake with your mouth, then you can plan on perfection.
There’s only one perfect thing and it’s Jesus.
And the bible says that when the perfect comes the imperfect will pass away.
Well, the perfect is referring to when Jesus returns again.
And by the way, and this is the most interesting part, it’s actually the imperfect things in our life that God uses to perfect us.
Joyce, we did something kind of fun, and we went on social media and we asked all of our friends, if you could sit here in this chair and have a candid conversation with Joyce, what would you like to talk about?
And we got so many responses, a lot of, um, good things.
But surprisingly enough, one of the top things that they want to talk to you about is what we’re going to do today in our candid conversation, and that is this question, What happens after you die?
I think many people right now are just there’s some fear, and there are a lot of questions, so I think it’s a great conversation to have.
Well, I thought I’d start out by saying I can’t tell you by experience because I haven’t died yet.
That’s the problem. Nobody can. Right?
I went back to the Bible, which I mean I’ve studied this before, but there’s a lot of really great scriptures that tell us that we have nothing to fear unless of course we’re not living for God.
And the Bible does tell us that we have 2 choices, heaven or hell. Mhmm.
And, uh, I know there are people that like to say they don’t believe in hell, but it’s in the Bible.
You’re either going to believe the Bible or you’re not going to believe the Bible.
You can’t just pick and choose what you Right. You know, what you want.
And then there’s people who say, well, I just don’t believe that a good God would send somebody to hell.
Well, God doesn’t send anybody to hell.
People make their own choices and that doesn’t mean that we have to live perfect lives to go to heaven.
The Bible says in order to be saved, you must believe that Jesus died for your sins and that He rose from the dead and confess it with your mouth.
And obviously, if you truly believe in Jesus, I mean truly believe in Jesus, not just like some kind of a mental, well yes, I believe there’s a God out there somewhere.
But if you truly believe in Jesus and then you’re going to want to serve him, you’re going to want to know his word, you’re going to want to serve him.
And the more revelation you get on how much God loves you and how good you are and how good He is, uh, the more you want to do the right thing.
But even in wanting to do the right thing, we still never live perfect lives.
And so the Bible promises us that if our name is written in the Lamb’s book of life, which it’s in there if you’re truly saved, then you’re never going to come up for judgment concerning your salvation.
But there’s a lot of scriptures that still talk about that after we die, there will be a judgment.
We will face God and give an account of our lives. And
Well, let let me ask you a question just to clarify that because I think that’s one of the things that a lot of people have fear about is will will I make it or not?
You know, have have I done enough good, or how do I know that my my name is in the book?
Yeah. So we will all face judgment, but there is that question of what happens when I get to that gate?
Yeah.
You know, what is we don’t know what it’s like.
We don’t know what it’s like. I just, you know, I know it’s gonna be good.
I know heaven’s going to be beautiful beyond anything that we could even possibly imagine, you know?
There’s 12 gates going into the city and each one is made out of 1 single pearl and the streets are made out of translucent gold.
So I just said, Can’t be too bad. Yeah.
Who has a problem with sparkle is gonna have a hard time in heaven.
But, uh, a story that I wanna tell that I think just is amazing, doesn’t give direct answers, but it’s it still says a lot in itself.
A friend of mine, her mother was sick for quite a while, and, um, her and her husband and other brothers and sisters took turns staying with the mom.
And she got to the point where she couldn’t really raise herself up in bed.
They were just kind of biding their time, you know, waiting for her to come to the inn.
And all of a sudden one day she raised straight up in bed, got a smile on her face, and said, yes.
And she died.
Wow.
And so she obviously saw something
Right.
That was exciting and beautiful.
But one of my favorite scriptures, and we talk about this judgment, Romans 1412 says that we will all come before God and give an account of our lives.
So I don’t I won’t give an account for somebody else, I’ll give an account for me.
But I know I’m born again. I know that my name is written in the Lamb’s book of life.
I’m doing the best on it. I know how to to serve God.
I repent when I make mistakes.
Um Yeah. You’re not perfect.
You’re not perfect. I’m you know, I make mistakes all the time.
But but our right standing with God is not based on our perfection.
It’s based on our faith in Jesus.
He that knew no sin became sin that we might be made right with God through Jesus Christ.
But nonetheless, we will have this judgment, but it’s not we’re not being judged there for our salvation, not people that are that are born again.
Right.
Uh, people that aren’t are going to have a different experience.
But we are going to be judged for our works.
And I think that’s interesting that we’re going to have rewards for our works that we’ve done in the body here on earth, or we’re gonna lose those rewards.
But 1st Corinthians 3 10 through 15, in the amplified classic edition, I love this scripture.
It says, according to the grace the special endowment for my task of God bestowed on me, like a skillful architect and master builder, I laid the foundation and now another man is building upon it.
But let each man be careful how he builds upon that foundation.
For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is already laid, which is Jesus Christ the Messiah, the Anointed One.
So, let’s just say we’re born again and Jesus becomes the foundation of our lives. Mhmm.
But if anybody builds on that foundation, whether it be with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, or straw.
So, we all build some kind of life, but what kind of life are we building?
You know, there’s many people who say they believe in God.
They believe they’ve accepted Christ as their savior, but they still live very selfish, self centered lives where they’re really not doing anybody else any good or trying to help anybody else in any way.
The work of each one will become plainly and openly known, shown for what it is, for the day of Christ will disclose and declare it, because it will be revealed with fire.
Now I don’t know this for a fact, but there’s a place in Revelation where Jesus is depicted as having eyes like fire.
Mhmm. And so I think that this could represent that when we when we stand before God on that judgment day, that that will be Him looking at us and our works.
And the fire will trust and test and critically appraise the character and the worth of the work that each person has done.
Now, this to me is good.
If the work which anybody has built on this foundation, any product of his effort, whatever survives this test, he will get his reward.
But if any person’s work is burned up under the test, he will suffer the loss of all of it losing his reward, though he himself will be saved, but only as one who has passed through the fire.
So basically this is telling me that you know, if I’m born again, I’m born again.
And if I’m truly born again, believe in Christ, trust Him for the forgiveness of my sins.
I’m I’m going to go to heaven, but who in their right mind wouldn’t want all the rewards Right.
That God could give him? I mean, I have no idea what they are, but Yeah.
I’m sure they’re probably pretty awesome. And I
This is so much to take in. Yeah.
So the the what you’re talking about is not a yes or no to get into heaven based on our works.
Mhmm. It is not that. That is not how we get into heaven. No.
But it is a judgment of our life that will talk about the the rewards that we receive once we’re in heaven.
Right. And I don’t you you rarely ever hear this Yeah.
Talked about, but, um, I think that these works that are going to be judged, I think they’re going to be judged based on motives.
In other words, people, they live too much on the surface and don’t think very much about why they’re doing what they’re doing.
Mhmm. You know, we just think, well, you know, I’ve done this and I’ve done that.
Like, you know, there’s a lot of people you can say, do you believe you’ll go to heaven when you die?
Well, you know, I I try to live a good life, you know.
I try to do this, I try to do that and that that tells me they don’t really understand.
You know, you you can’t really love God and appreciate what Jesus has done in your life and not want to do anything back for Him.
We don’t do good works to get God to love us.
We do them because we’re so amazed at how much He does love us.
And I wish that this was taught more in all churches.
We have to know who we are in Christ before we can ever really you you have to be made right with God before you can do anything right.
Right.
I mean, how many people live their whole life and never really they think about impressing people and I do this to impress people and, you know, the Bible talks about don’t pray to, you know, to be heard of people and don’t pray to be admired and don’t give in order for people to, you know, admire you.
But do what you do, even if you have to do it in secret, do it unto God.
And because you believe that that’s really what he wants you to do.
And so, you know, we can fool a lot of people but we can’t fool him.
Yeah.
And so, you know, God knows why I’m in this ministry and why I do the work I do and why you do the work that you do.
And and it it can’t be to get attention, to be well thought of.
It’s like motives are very important to God. And motives are very simply the why behind the what.
So God’s not as interested in what I’m doing, you know, because there’s a place in the Bible that says many will say, well, you know, Lord, Lord, we did this, we did that, we did this, we did that, and he’ll say, I never knew you.
Right. You know? God wanted us because he wanted somebody to have a relationship with. Yeah.
So there’s just so many scriptures.
Hebrews 927 says, just as people are destined to die once and after that to face the judgment.
Well, that pretty much does away with the thought of reincarnation.
Dying once.
We’re gonna die once, and then we’re gonna face the judgment.
So we must all appear, 2nd Corinthians 510, we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body, rather good or bad.
But here again, that’s not that’s not to buy your salvation.
That has to already be a settled fact before you ever even if if you’ve not received Christ as your savior and you don’t right motive because you’re always gonna be doing them
That’s so true.
To get something. Yeah. And then, um, now what’s heaven gonna be like?
He’ll wipe every tear from their eyes.
There’ll be no more death or mourning or crying or pain for the old order of things has passed away.
So we know it’s going to be a very happy place.
Imagine being in a place where there’s no hatred, no strife, no arguing, no disunity, where it’s total peace, an atmosphere of total and complete love, where worship is going on all the time.
And I you know, I don’t know beyond that.
Maybe it’s going to be so amazing that God couldn’t even tell us. You know what I mean?
Paul said that he went to the 3rd heavens and saw things that he couldn’t even find words Right.
To explain. People do not be afraid do not need to be afraid of death as long as they know in their heart that they’ve received Christ as their Lord and Savior.
You don’t even have to feel like you have to do everything just right.
I just always say, get up every day, give it your all, do the best you can, and God will take care of the rest.
I mean, if
Yeah.
Go ahead.
Well, what I love about all all of these things that you’re sharing is it builds a greater picture.
It builds a continuation of life rather than an end to it.
In other words, our life here on earth is finished, but in that moment, we go on into something
Oh, yeah.
So much greater and completely different, and that that relationship that we’re building with Christ here is the foundation of that.
Right. But it it gives you such a different piece and even a different feeling about death that it is more of the next step than the end.
Yeah. I mean, people say it’s like going through a revolving door.
Like I said, I haven’t died, so I don’t know what it’s like.
And I don’t know that everybody’s experience is exactly the same.
Yeah.
But there are enough people that have had these near death experiences and everybody talks about seeing a light.
Everybody talks about the feeling of complete peace and happiness and joy.
I mean, I understand what Paul meant when he said, to live is Christ to die is gain.
I mean, my purpose here now is to serve God and finish the work that He’s called me to do.
And I love my life, but I’m looking forward to heaven.
I mean, I think it’s gonna be amazing beyond anything that we can possibly imagine and I really hate to see people be so afraid of what it’s going to be like.
We know that God is good and so as good as He is to us sometimes here, you know Oh, yeah.
We can’t even imagine how good it’s gonna be when we
Heaven will blow the doors off that.
When we go to heaven, and so
I think it’s harder here for people because they miss those people who’ve gone gone on.
You know, death is so much harder for those who are left behind.
Well, and when we grieve for people that have died, we’re not really grieving for them, we’re grieving for us.
Right. You know, we’ve lost them, but they’re better off.
I mean Paul said at one point he said, I’m hard pressed to decide between the 2.
He said, I would rather leave and go on and go to heaven. That would be better for me.
But it would be better for you Right. If I stay here and continue to teach you the word.
And that’s pretty much the way I feel, you know.
I’m so grateful that I don’t have to be afraid of that and I don’t want other people to be afraid and I don’t I don’t want them to misunderstand anything that I’m saying today.
You just let me say again, you don’t have to be perfect. We make mistakes.
If we could be perfect and never make mistakes then we we wouldn’t need Jesus.
The reason why God sent him is because we can’t
Right.
Be perfect. And, um, you know, there’s just so many scriptures.
I mean, if people would just study these scriptures even for themselves in the Bible, just get on get online and look up, uh, scriptures about heaven or scriptures about what happened to what happens to us when we die.
Mhmm. I mean, that’s all I did, you know Yeah. To get all these.
And, uh, uh, I mean, you know, there’s just like Daniel 12:2 says, multitudes who sleep in the dust of the earth will awake, some to everlasting life, some to shame and everlasting contempt.
And, you know, if we just want to stretch ourselves a minute and talk about people who are not believers in Christ, you know.
We’ve got a phone number on our screen and we’d be happy for them to call if they doubt their salvation or they know they haven’t given their life to Christ yet.
We’d love to have one of our operators talk with them and and lead them into a relationship with Christ through prayer.
I mean really, being born again is the simplest thing in the world.
You just have to be willing to turn away from sin and turn toward God and be sorry for the way you’ve lived, and ask him to help you live the way that he wants you to live.
Being a Christian is an exciting life because there is always something to learn. Mhmm. Always. That is very true.
Something to learn.
Well, it’s a great conversation. I mean, you know, it’s it’s the real stuff of life.
It’s what’s on people’s minds. It’s it’s a deep dive into God’s word, so thank you very much.
And I wanna say too, you don’t I don’t want anybody to get off on to, well, now I better try to do a lot of good work so I get rewards.
Yeah.
You don’t even do the good works to get the reward. That’s the thing.
Because if you do then your motive’s wrong again.
Right.
So it’s all because I love the Lord and I want to make him happy.
I want to do things for other people because it blesses him when we do that.
Yeah. Thanks, Joyce.
You’re welcome.
Fear, stress, loneliness, anger, self worth, guilt, and shame.
In today’s world, it’s easy to struggle in our minds, to feel we have no control of our thoughts.
But there’s a way for you to experience long lasting peace, confidence, and contentment.
Well, for years years I thought what’s wrong with me?
I had so many voices in my head and so much guilt and shame in my life.
I didn’t know what real peace was.
I was driven by emotions and because of abuse I’d experienced growing up, I never felt confident or secure.
But then victory came because I learned through God’s word that I had more control over my thought life than I had realized.
I wrote everything that I learned about the mind and my journey to freedom in my most requested book ever, Battlefield of the Mind.
The truths contained in this book have stood the test of time.
Now I can say to you with certainty your mind can be free.
I want you to have your copy today so that you can finally know true peace in your life.
We would like to send you a copy of Battlefield of the Mind.
It is available to you right now for your gift of any size to the ministry.
Call us today at 1-800-709-2895 or visit us online at joycemeyer.org to get your copy and start your journey to victory over fear, over anxiety, over insecurity, and so much more.
It was one of the most powerful books in my healing journey.
Understanding the victory that really is ours.
It was my big God moment. I read the book one person and then finished it a different one.
I wanna get this book, Battlefield of the Mind, into your hands today.
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